Sorry you know me

When I meet a new person, I feel a little bad for them knowing me. Research shows that just being acquainted with a divorced person increases your own chance of divorce. I have felt challenged to make new mom friends through my children's schools. I feel like I have a big red DIVORCED sign burned into my forehead. Maybe I should keep it a secret. But any time someone refers to, "Your husband," or my maiden name, I feel compelled to say, "We're divorced, but ____" and continue the conversation.

Some of the stigma is in my mind. New research shows that women who never marry or have children are among the happiest group of people! But society still has norms and expectations, and leading by example is very real. I am a living, breathing testament to the fact that life goes on after divorce, and I am thriving on my own. I see any shreds of doubt about married women's marriages coming up in their minds in response to my example. I might reinforce their own happiness about their partners, or maybe they pity me. When women complain about their partners, I tell them I'm divorced. Maybe other people's thoughts about me are none of my business (:

At our divorce settlement, I cried and said I'd rather be married than have half the money we made together over 13 years. I wish my marriage had worked out. But instead, I embody the truth that if you're unhappy and leave, life can be better. If you meet me, I'm sorry in advance!

(This is a bit tongue in cheek)